More about Disability and Family Leave

I can say now, after the fact that it was actually very easy. In a nut shell: Disability lasts for 6 weeks for regular delivery and 8 weeks for a C-section. Once your Dr. completes the disability form, which most OB/GYN's have in their office, you have to wait the 7 day waiting period after delivery before you mail in your application. Once you mail it, you can expect your 1st check in about 2 weeks. If there is a problem or questions about your application, they call you! At some point you receive a final check for Disability and a notice to sign if you want to extend this Disability for 6 more weeks at the same 55% of your salary in the the Family Leave Program. You can receive both Disability and Family Leave money. Disability comes first. There is no 7 day waiting period between Disability and Family Leave. Employers have very different ways of handling the 55% payment, so check with your Human Resources or Personnel office but also try to contact a coworker who has recently been on maternity leave for tips. State employees and some teachers are not eligible for this program. For more information on State Disability Programs related to pregnancy go to http://www.dol.gov/

For more information on the FMLA and family leave policies contact:

U.S. Department of Labor
Wage and Hour Division
200 Constitution Avenue, NW
Washington, D.C. 20210
Phone: 1-877-889-5627
Family and Medical Leave Act
http://www.dol.gov/
FMLA http://www.dol.gov/whd/fmla/index.htm

National Partnership for Women & Families
1875 Connecticut Avenue, NW, Suite 710
Washington, DC 20009
Phone: (202) 986-2600
Fax: (202) 986-2539http://www.nationalpartnership.org/

Families and Work Institute
267 Fifth Ave., 2nd floor
New York, NY 10016
Telephone: (212) 465-2044
Fax: (212) 465-8637http://www.familiesandwork.org

More about: The Family Medical Leave Act

When using PPO insurance all services will be billed separate

With a PPO type plan, lab tests, anesthesiologist, and any assisting Dr's will all send you separate bills in addition to the bills you expected. Some of these people (who you do not have the option to choose) are considered "out of network" meaning your insurance will try to pay less than you expected. If an "out of network" Dr. was one that assisted and you did not choose them, such as an anesthesiologist, some insurance companies will treat the claim as an "in network" claim. You have to call them though.

But worse than that is the 3-10 calls per claim (I had about 15 claims related to pregnancy and newborn care). That is hours on the phone! By having a PPO plan you will usually pay $1,000-$3,000 extra if not more. The money was not as much the issue for me, but the hassel of having to fight the system for every claim to be covered was annoying.

Also, many insurance plans cover newborns on your plan for 30 days while you establish a plan for them either with your insurance carrier or with another company. If your baby is using your plan, they rarely tell you that your baby needs to meet a deductible of their own. Even if your deductible has been met, there is a new detucitble for your baby. They also deny payments for routine visits and will only pay if there is a problem. Yet they never tell you that.

The pregnany care beforehand might be different so make sure to compare what you get with HMO vs. PPO.The best solution for all these problems is to change to HMO during open enrollment periods if you can find an HMO doctor that suits you. Then change back to a PPO type plan after the baby so you have access to your "choice" doctors. Talk to the Human Resources department at your company or organization.


It takes more than 6-8 weeks to heal from a C-Section/Cesarean or regular delivery

I had a C-section and based on my experience, you will still be sore in you lower abdomen for a few months to a year. Later as things heal, feeling is lost in the lower abdomen due to the cutting of nerve fibers. Eventually they should return to almost normal, although I have spoken to a few women who still had pain, itching, or numbness a year later. For me, one of the most terrible things about the C-section was if anything touched my stomach during the first month and a half (not even the incision area), it really hurt. Even a bed sheet at night hurt. I was lucky it was summer and the weather was warm so I slept without covers.

In addition to the pain at incision site and in lower abdomen, you also need constant care for the first few weeks while trying to care for your baby. It hurts to get up. For scar care, to keep your scar from getting infected, take a wash cloth and dip it in warm water with a few tablespoons of Epson Salt three times a day. Leave the wash cloth on for 5 minutes each time. Put Neosporin on scar once a day too.

Overall, I had an earthquake in almost every system in my body. Nothing feels the same for months. To minimize all this as much as you possibly can, be sure to follow your doctor's recovery procedures closely and report all symptoms to your doc, even the embarrassing ones.


Weaning from Breastfeeding was not fun

I had such a hard time finding good information on this topic. Since the world is pro-breastfeeding and with good reason, it seems like they do not want to talk about weaning. The sites and books I reviewed always talked about the effect weaning has on your baby, but what about the effect it has on you?

When I decided to stop breastfeeding it was nothing I could have even expected. I slowly weaned in combination with breastfeeding and pumping. Once you start reducing your milk supply things can get painful fast. It took about 3 weeks for the pain to end. The 3 weeks felt more like 3 months! I thought it would never end. It was always worse in the morning after laying down for an extended period of time. Hard spots in the breast and clogged ducts are common.

To treat your breast discomfort, take a hot shower or bath each morning and place hot wash cloths on the sore areas. After your shower, put ice packs or cabbage leaves in your bra (which are cold and act as formfitting ice packs - cut center out for nipple). Repeat mid-day if needed.

When breasts are burning, heavy, or sore use breast pump for 2-5 minutes on each side for first few days, then one minute only on each side for a week. Or to make it easy, pump until you are comfortable but try to stick to 1-2 minutes each side. Some women say weaning came without much pain. I hope you are one of those women. I sure was not. When you wean your baby, you will probably feel a sense of guilt, which is totally normal. Remember you did the best you could and there are so many adults these days that were not breastfed and they are fine! Plus infant formula is just getting better and there are so many other ways to bond.

Signing-up for free Baby Magazines

Expect to get lots of coupons and free cans of formula. But you also get junk mail. The reason I know this is because when I signed up for the American Baby magazine, I used a different last name so I could see what came from the company. I was able to see who they sold my name and address to by what I got in the mail under my "assumed" name. I got lots! Make sure to check that formula cans are not dented or expired before using them. Always clean the inside of the formula can lids too.

Baby swings and saucers are not ideal in the early days until a baby reaches about 3 months and can hold his/her head up.
There are swings that recline but most do not.

Having your baby hold their head up in a swing before 3-4 months will be very tiring and should be limited if your baby starts to get fussy. After the 3-4 months, they are the best invention ever! If your baby is bored, fussy, or tired, a swing is very useful. If your baby has colic a swing can be useful early on.

Growing feet??

Yes my feet did swell and never went back to the original size. I grew more than one whole size. It can happen………

Products I did NOT need:

Baby Monitor - Can be a necessity if you have a large house or a loud air conditioner or heater. I bought one when my baby was 5 weeks old so I could go by the pool while my baby was sleeping inside. I have only used it twice. If you use a monitor during the night, you will be awakened by all the sounds a baby makes while sleeping. It might also cause you to run in the room (possibly waking the baby) when s/he would have gone back to sleep in less than a minute. Don't get into a neurotic habit of constantly checking on the baby when the baby is in a safe place like a crib. Always wait 30 seconds to a minute before you respond to any cry.

Bottle Warmer - These are not necessary! Instead just take a standard mug and fill it half full way with water. Then, for a 4-6 oz. bottle, microwave for 2 minutes. Place the bottle in it for about 2-3 minutes without the top. For a bottle larger than 6 oz. place in water for 5 minutes. Always test. If it is too hot, just set it down top off for a minute or two. It will cool very quickly. Time may vary slightly depending on microwave. You can always add some cold formula in the bottle to cool it as well.

Crib Bumper Pad - When your baby can roll, it might be a suffocation hazard. On the other hand, a few active babies might need the cushion. Most don't. Without a bumper, your baby can look out to see their wonderful room. You can also peak in and see your baby in the crib without disturbing the baby. It is fine to close your baby's bedroom door while they sleep. Just leave it ajar. If they are upset, trust me, you will hear them!

Baby Sling or Carrier - These are very heavy and hard on your back. Babies start getting heavy very quickly. Some parents who have babies with colic or who always wants to be held say it works for them. Most moms and dads say they never use it or have used it only once or twice.

Products I DID need:

Microwave Sterilizer - So easy and fast it made sterilizing simple.
Bouncy Chair with Vibrator - A favorite spot to sit for most babies-buzzer is amazing to stop a crying baby!
Sleep Positioner - Get the one with an adjustable velcro-washable too.
CD's with lullabys or baby music - It can be hard to find appropriate music in your collection, and classical radio has too many commercials.
Bibs (Adjustable with Velcro) - Secure velcro before washing.
Bottle Brush and Drying Rack - There are ones that sit on the sink edge and drain into the sink. Also it is useful to buy a basket for your dishwasher if you plan to wash nipples/rings and pacifiers that way. Bottles can also be washed in the dishwasher.